Impediment

Fear is an impediment, as uncertainty, lack of resources, connections, and inexperience are. At least, to me, they’ve hindered me for so long. Paralyzed, doing nothing, but secretly hoping things will turn for the best.

And I figured, after a long period of idle, short-lived attempts, and even regressing after quite a success, what constantly impedes us is us. Usually what we’re battling with is ourselves––an internal tension. The world has become safer and filled with opportunities, but instead of it stirring us forward, it softened us and made us complacent. Our lizard brain tells us that inaction is safer.

And as I write this, I feel a shudder from resistance. I know that every day, every minute, is a chance to enrich my life. And yet, even I know that life is short, I still feel a strong pull towards wasting more of it, rather than actually making every bit count.

I found that it helps when we believe that what we’re doing is intentional and aligned with our values. When we satisfy our internal rudder, instead of going against it, our actions, even the detours in our lives, become a part of the whole. We derive benefit and meaning from our decisions.

More or less, we will remain our worst enemy. We can limit being the hurdle to our own life by doing exactly what makes us afraid, envious, discontent and frustrated. When we feel a strong pull towards an activity and an equal evasion to it, that’s our clue. Not hiding or running away, but immersing and catapulting ourselves through the waves of our inner conflict can we only break through.